Wanna be Supermom

Saturday, November 28, 2009

My rant about stupid CPS

Ok, so I just feel like ranting today about CPS. I am not even sure why they are called "child protective services" they sure dont seem to be about protecting children, they should be called BPPS, (Bad Parent Protective Services) because thats what they do, they protect the bad parents. That is why children are in and out of foster homes.
In our situation we had a great CPS worker that was trying to protect our baby girl, she had it all set to go for termination. Nobody in this babys family was doing anything at all to get her or showing much interest even. Now we have a new worker and she wants an extention so "mom" can get her life together (like she hasnt had time to do this already), even the judge thought this was a long shot. We have had our baby for almost a year! Oh and the other thing they would like her to be placed with "creepy guy" he would be a better placement. Not to mention that he is facing pending criminal charges, he has never bothered to come around to see her until she was 9 months old, he is unemployed, the list could literally go on and on!!!! Thank God that my baby does have people fighting for her. But its sure not CPS. Now, why are they called CPS again........?

Friday, October 23, 2009

needing God

Had a meeting with the caseworker today. Now I am worried again. It seems like the family is trying so hard to fight this and as my baby girls attorney said "aggressivley seeking placement with "creepy white guy". I feel like my head has turned to mush and like I have been slapped in the face. I know that this is MY baby girl, and I know that satan comes in and tries to mess with you when you are being blessed. I just feel like I cant catch my breath. I cant lose my baby, she is my heart. I know that right now is when I really need to cling to my faith and know that God is there, sometimes its so hard. I know when I went to court last time that God was there and I need to know that he still is. I am feeling very sick and lost right now. I am just praying that God will give me some peace about this.
I just want this creepy guy to go away and leave my baby girl alone.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Frustration

I haven't talked to Morgan all week and I miss him so much! I get so paranoid and I tend to think the worst at times like this. I have tried calling and finally today I got to talk to him. I asked if he wanted to go to the game tomorrow and he was so excited. Finally my world was back where it should be. Then an hour later he calls crying his eyes out because his dad grounded him and now he cant go to the game. It broke my heart to hear my baby crying his eyes out like that and I couldn't do anything to help. I couldn't be there to hug him, to hold him, to tell him that everything is alright. I understand that when he does wrong he needs to be disciplined, but as a mother it hurts so much to hear your child that upset and not be able to be there and comfort him. I told him to apologize to his dad and talk to him, and I am hoping he will change his mind. I miss him so much sometimes, its so hard not having him here, when he is such an important part of us. I just had to get this out, and this is such a good way to do it!

Friday, August 21, 2009

What God can do

I am sitting here thinking about how wonderful this year has been and all of the things that God has done for us this year. It amazes me that at the beginning of the year how different things were. We have moved on with the situation with Morgan and he is a part of our lives again--thank God! and know we have our beautiful baby girl. Tyler is doing well--I think--its so hard to tell with him (teenagers). They say that even in something bad, God can create a blessing out of it, I never really understood that until recently. When Morgan was taken from us I could not imagine any kind of blessing that God could give me out of that, but he not only gave me my baby girl (which we would not be in the situation to have her, if not for the Morgan situation), he has given us Morgan back! God is so awesome! When I went to court last month for our baby girl everyone thought the judge was going to send her to that scary guy (cant go to much into this) and the night before court I cried and prayed and God told me to relax and let him show me what he can do. The next day at court everything went perfect! I am not going to go to much into this, its just a part of what God has done for us recently. I am so excited to see what God has in store for us next!